Some very poor choices here. No Diop? How can that be? Who do you think is capable of being a bigger badass than Vinnie Jones?
A very verbose copy paste job below. Goto the below link for a easier read.
#20. Carsten Jancker
Potential roles - Evil German terrorist henchman, evil Nazi henchman, basically anything to do with being German and looking hard. Also, maybe an ogre. If you're cursed to be born with a surname that rhymes with "wanker" then you'd better look ridiculously hard if you don't want to be called on it every day of your life. Thankfully for Carsten, he looks like someone who got thrown out of the military for being too intimidatin
#19. Anderson
Too much stuff he could do in Hollywood. Mainly involving shooting shit, a lot. Then eventually being apprehended by some wise cracking twat. For the moment the only wise cracking twat he has to deal with is Rio Ferdinand. I would start thinking about the movies.
Potential roles - Post apocalyptic gangster, hipster vampire, super villain, that dude from the Da Vince code. There's something inherently cool, yet sinister about young people with grey hair. It's not like any real acting is required either, I mean the guy is called the white feather. He both looks and sounds like a comic book villain already, albeit not a very tough one on the ears. Just wait until the super hero actually ran into him, though.
#17. Eric Cantona
No Pic needed for this cunt.
Potential roles - Anything that requires an actor who is snooty, French and villainous, which in Hollywood is a regular occurrence.
#16. Alexi Lalas
Potential roles - Barbarian, Gladiator nemesis, someone Mel Gibson would get to kill in something.
#15. Nobby Stiles
Potential roles - A sadistic redcoat, hooligan, beating up Halle Berry.
The problem with Vinnie Jones and gritty Hollywood villains in general is that they're too manicured. Real gritty people who would put a glass through your face because you don't have a lighter when they ask you for one do not have perfect teeth and olive skin. (Vinnie Jones. manicured?)
#14. Ferenc Puskas
He looks like a nice guy actually.
#13. Eduardo Da Silva
Seriously?
Potential roles - Something in a movie about a giant Prince destroying New York would work I guess, also any 70's drug lord.
I will grant you that Eduardo did not look too badass lying on the floor screaming in pain with his foot hanging off the other week. You have to cut the guy some slack though, his fucking foot was hanging off! Shit like that would make Steven Seagal wince.
The point with Eduardo is that he's gone through life looking like a giant version of Prince and noone has been able to give him enough shit for it for him to want to change his image. The only possible explanations for this is that he's either that much of a badass that noone dares mention it to him, or that he's got thicker skin than Godzilla. Either way it's pretty badass, especially in a Croatia team where everyone else looks pretty sensible (apart from Vedran Corluka, obviously) and then there is a giant version of Prince strutting around upfront.
#12. Gennaro Gattuso
Potential roles - Any number of angry unkempt people, spaghetti westerns, maybe could even stretch to playing a loveable rogue.
#11. Tomas Gravesen
Potential roles - Anything in a fantasy flick, corrupt yet hard as nails cop, pirate, biker, random guy who appears for the sole purpose of beating the shit out of someone.
#10. Frank Worthington
Potential roles - Anything that requires someone sleazy yet deadly. Bond villains, Guy Ritchie gang bosses, Costa Del Sol crime films, whatever. I always thought Sami Hyypia would be a perfect clinical Bond Villain.
#9. Paul Breitner
Seriously, just look at him.
#8. Graeme Souness
Potential roles - Begbie from Trainspotting.
Shaving off the 'stache and getting a sensible haircut was probably the worst career move Souness ever made. As it transpired he went to try and sort out Newcastle's dressing room full of utter nobheads looking like an quite stern geography teacher. As I could have told him before he committed career suicide, it didn't work out.
#7. Trifon Ivanov
Potential roles - Okay, so this one doesn't really stretch much beyond werewolves, but still...
#6. Stig Tofting
Potential roles - Beating people up in horror films, beating people up in drama films, beating people up in comedies, beating people up in films where it's totally unrelated to the plot just for the sheer hell of it.
If most people saw Stig Tofting, they would expect to get beaten up. That's for a good reason because there's a good chance you would get beaten up. Stig is a legit member of Hell's Angels and has been convicted for brutally assaulting a cafe owner, see. The really disturbing thing about it is that he's a seriously dangerous man and I still think his look is worse than his bite
A very verbose copy paste job below. Goto the below link for a easier read.
#20. Carsten Jancker
Potential roles - Evil German terrorist henchman, evil Nazi henchman, basically anything to do with being German and looking hard. Also, maybe an ogre. If you're cursed to be born with a surname that rhymes with "wanker" then you'd better look ridiculously hard if you don't want to be called on it every day of your life. Thankfully for Carsten, he looks like someone who got thrown out of the military for being too intimidatin
#19. Anderson
Too much stuff he could do in Hollywood. Mainly involving shooting shit, a lot. Then eventually being apprehended by some wise cracking twat. For the moment the only wise cracking twat he has to deal with is Rio Ferdinand. I would start thinking about the movies.
Potential roles - Post apocalyptic gangster, hipster vampire, super villain, that dude from the Da Vince code. There's something inherently cool, yet sinister about young people with grey hair. It's not like any real acting is required either, I mean the guy is called the white feather. He both looks and sounds like a comic book villain already, albeit not a very tough one on the ears. Just wait until the super hero actually ran into him, though.
#17. Eric Cantona
No Pic needed for this cunt.
Potential roles - Anything that requires an actor who is snooty, French and villainous, which in Hollywood is a regular occurrence.
#16. Alexi Lalas
Potential roles - Barbarian, Gladiator nemesis, someone Mel Gibson would get to kill in something.
#15. Nobby Stiles
Potential roles - A sadistic redcoat, hooligan, beating up Halle Berry.
The problem with Vinnie Jones and gritty Hollywood villains in general is that they're too manicured. Real gritty people who would put a glass through your face because you don't have a lighter when they ask you for one do not have perfect teeth and olive skin. (Vinnie Jones. manicured?)
#14. Ferenc Puskas
He looks like a nice guy actually.
#13. Eduardo Da Silva
Seriously?
Potential roles - Something in a movie about a giant Prince destroying New York would work I guess, also any 70's drug lord.
I will grant you that Eduardo did not look too badass lying on the floor screaming in pain with his foot hanging off the other week. You have to cut the guy some slack though, his fucking foot was hanging off! Shit like that would make Steven Seagal wince.
The point with Eduardo is that he's gone through life looking like a giant version of Prince and noone has been able to give him enough shit for it for him to want to change his image. The only possible explanations for this is that he's either that much of a badass that noone dares mention it to him, or that he's got thicker skin than Godzilla. Either way it's pretty badass, especially in a Croatia team where everyone else looks pretty sensible (apart from Vedran Corluka, obviously) and then there is a giant version of Prince strutting around upfront.
#12. Gennaro Gattuso
Potential roles - Any number of angry unkempt people, spaghetti westerns, maybe could even stretch to playing a loveable rogue.
#11. Tomas Gravesen
Potential roles - Anything in a fantasy flick, corrupt yet hard as nails cop, pirate, biker, random guy who appears for the sole purpose of beating the shit out of someone.
#10. Frank Worthington
Potential roles - Anything that requires someone sleazy yet deadly. Bond villains, Guy Ritchie gang bosses, Costa Del Sol crime films, whatever. I always thought Sami Hyypia would be a perfect clinical Bond Villain.
#9. Paul Breitner
Seriously, just look at him.
#8. Graeme Souness
Potential roles - Begbie from Trainspotting.
Shaving off the 'stache and getting a sensible haircut was probably the worst career move Souness ever made. As it transpired he went to try and sort out Newcastle's dressing room full of utter nobheads looking like an quite stern geography teacher. As I could have told him before he committed career suicide, it didn't work out.
#7. Trifon Ivanov
Potential roles - Okay, so this one doesn't really stretch much beyond werewolves, but still...
#6. Stig Tofting
Potential roles - Beating people up in horror films, beating people up in drama films, beating people up in comedies, beating people up in films where it's totally unrelated to the plot just for the sheer hell of it.
If most people saw Stig Tofting, they would expect to get beaten up. That's for a good reason because there's a good chance you would get beaten up. Stig is a legit member of Hell's Angels and has been convicted for brutally assaulting a cafe owner, see. The really disturbing thing about it is that he's a seriously dangerous man and I still think his look is worse than his bite
