THE JOSE MOURINHO CHARM OFFENSIVE, PART ONE
Hello, losers! It Jose Mourinho here: top-top manager, PE teacher, translator and short-haired, large-headed human being. Why I talk to all you sons and bitches now? I tell you. I misunderstood. Big time. Most misunderstood person in entire universe on planet. You think I arrogant, nasty, horrible and bad man. News flash: it true! But it not whole story. No. I also top-top nice guy who some people want to stroke and maybe also lick ear. So I decide to change image. Although I hate you all and want to rub you off shoe, I also want to tell truth and make you see what a top-top good guy Mourniho is, and then even you want to shine my shoe. So, when I not too busy, I come on here and give you glimpse into Mourinho's real personality by revealing some favourite things. I won't ask 'OK?' because Mourinho has no need to ask anyone anything, so I just go ahead.
FAVOURITE THING NUMBER ONE:
THE CARPENTERS
Mourinho always been top-top fan of the two highly professional Carpenter children. They absolutely top-top middle-of-road rock band. Take song 'Goodbye love': very acceptable singing voice all way through, with top-top guitar solo in middle and then again at end while the two carpenters keep going 'ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah...' Absolutely top-top, special performance. But that not all. We also have such other all-time hit busters as 'Every Sha-la-la,' 'Rainy Day Always Bad Thing on Monday,' 'I'm on the Top-Top of World,' 'Close to Me' and, of course, their most top-top hit in Portugal, 'Jambalaya':
Jambalaya and a crawfish pie and fillet gumbo
For tonight, I'm a-gonna see my my-my cher a mi-o
Pick guitar, fill fruit far and be gay-o
Son of a gun, well have big fun on the bayou
Mourinho not gay-o, of course, nor he have interest in ever being even a bit gay-o, ok, but aside from that this great lyric to embrace and share with all my friend. Also fantastic song to play in background when you actually are eating Jambalaya, so it have double value.
I not too keen on their later space-related song like that 'Calling Occupant of Top-Top Interplanetary Craft,' which scare me a tiny bit when hair was still black, but in general I smile and get very happy whenever Carpenter twins are on radio or Mourinho's very expensive I-pod. I also like fact girl is very clean and shiny, and boy always wear nice sweaters, t-shirt or cardigan in sports-casual way. This fact: Mourinho has their poster on wall of his bedroom, and sing their song in shower.
So there you are. I actually top-top nice guy, and most humble and shy guy I or you will ever know. So put all of this in your pipes and puff on it as you smoke!
Hello, losers! It Jose Mourinho here: top-top manager, PE teacher, translator and short-haired, large-headed human being. Why I talk to all you sons and bitches now? I tell you. I misunderstood. Big time. Most misunderstood person in entire universe on planet. You think I arrogant, nasty, horrible and bad man. News flash: it true! But it not whole story. No. I also top-top nice guy who some people want to stroke and maybe also lick ear. So I decide to change image. Although I hate you all and want to rub you off shoe, I also want to tell truth and make you see what a top-top good guy Mourniho is, and then even you want to shine my shoe. So, when I not too busy, I come on here and give you glimpse into Mourinho's real personality by revealing some favourite things. I won't ask 'OK?' because Mourinho has no need to ask anyone anything, so I just go ahead.
FAVOURITE THING NUMBER ONE:
THE CARPENTERS
Mourinho always been top-top fan of the two highly professional Carpenter children. They absolutely top-top middle-of-road rock band. Take song 'Goodbye love': very acceptable singing voice all way through, with top-top guitar solo in middle and then again at end while the two carpenters keep going 'ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah...' Absolutely top-top, special performance. But that not all. We also have such other all-time hit busters as 'Every Sha-la-la,' 'Rainy Day Always Bad Thing on Monday,' 'I'm on the Top-Top of World,' 'Close to Me' and, of course, their most top-top hit in Portugal, 'Jambalaya':
Jambalaya and a crawfish pie and fillet gumbo
For tonight, I'm a-gonna see my my-my cher a mi-o
Pick guitar, fill fruit far and be gay-o
Son of a gun, well have big fun on the bayou
Mourinho not gay-o, of course, nor he have interest in ever being even a bit gay-o, ok, but aside from that this great lyric to embrace and share with all my friend. Also fantastic song to play in background when you actually are eating Jambalaya, so it have double value.
I not too keen on their later space-related song like that 'Calling Occupant of Top-Top Interplanetary Craft,' which scare me a tiny bit when hair was still black, but in general I smile and get very happy whenever Carpenter twins are on radio or Mourinho's very expensive I-pod. I also like fact girl is very clean and shiny, and boy always wear nice sweaters, t-shirt or cardigan in sports-casual way. This fact: Mourinho has their poster on wall of his bedroom, and sing their song in shower.
So there you are. I actually top-top nice guy, and most humble and shy guy I or you will ever know. So put all of this in your pipes and puff on it as you smoke!
