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Divorce... WTF?!?!

If they are friends of any worth they will or should have given you support as well!

If not these are not true friends!
 
Pure undiluted genius Gene.

Condolences Whadda. You'll do this anyway, but focus on the kids and yourself, and try as far as humanly possible to let the other bullshit slide.
 
Whad - it might be a good idea to break certain Facebook links.

Suspecting something and actually having write infront of you are eons apart.

You have more than enough to contend with.
You really don't need or want to become embroiled in the mess that social networking can bring.

Just a thought, sir.

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
 
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]
Whad - it might be a good idea to break certain Facebook links.

Suspecting something and actually having write infront of you are eons apart.

You have more than enough to contend with.
You really don't need or want to become embroiled in the mess that social networking can bring.

Just a thought, sir.

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Facebook? Sorry mate, not following you... Dunno if I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but in my last post, I meant about life in general.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=46147.msg1373411#msg1373411 date=1312236367]
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]
Whad - it might be a good idea to break certain Facebook links.

Suspecting something and actually having write infront of you are eons apart.

You have more than enough to contend with.
You really don't need or want to become embroiled in the mess that social networking can bring.

Just a thought, sir.

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Facebook? Sorry mate, not following you... Dunno if I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but in my last post, I meant about life in general.
[/quote]

Yes, I'm sure you made reference, earlier in the thread, to seeing your wife, in a bikini, having a laugh in some Facebook photos.

If I made a mistake, I'm sorry.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=46147.msg1373411#msg1373411 date=1312236367]
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]
Whad - it might be a good idea to break certain Facebook links.

Suspecting something and actually having write infront of you are eons apart.

You have more than enough to contend with.
You really don't need or want to become embroiled in the mess that social networking can bring.

Just a thought, sir.

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Facebook? Sorry mate, not following you... Dunno if I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but in my last post, I meant about life in general.
[/quote]

What themn means is for you to delete her off Facebook.

Which is probably a good idea, but one that's pretty hard sometimes.

I've been a part of her family for 7 years; it's quite hard to accept that I might be replaced soon. Still have to prepare for it though.

Your friends are cunts though, and you're better off with them. SOme of them are probably just friends with you through your ex; and those are all going to disappear. But some friends were your friends before, so they may stick around. Big talk, since I dont have a clue who's going to stick around for me save for a handful.
 
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373416#msg1373416 date=1312238564]

Yes, I'm sure you made reference, earlier in the thread, to seeing your wife, in a bikini, having a laugh in some Facebook photos.

[/quote]

Nope.

*stalker alert*
 
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Or me...

I'm 41, my girlfriend is 30.....Back of the net!!!
 
[quote author=Spionkop69 link=topic=46147.msg1374167#msg1374167 date=1312381287]
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Or me...

I'm 41, my girlfriend is 30.....Back of the net!!!
[/quote]

ditto that! 36 me, GF 27...............Get In!!!
 
If you're reading all this Whaddpie, there's a line that's been drawn in the sand at 16. If you want to go younger than that you've got to move to France.
 
[quote author=gene hughes link=topic=46147.msg1374174#msg1374174 date=1312382091]
Jean is older than me....... Row Z!!!!
[/quote]

Lolz!!!
 
[quote author=Krump link=topic=46147.msg1374173#msg1374173 date=1312382022]
If you're reading all this Whaddpie, there's a line that's been drawn in the sand at 16. If you want to go younger than that you've got to move to France.
[/quote]

Half your age plus 7 is apparently the acceptable way of things as you get older.
 
[quote author=Avvy link=topic=46147.msg1374110#msg1374110 date=1312371320]
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=46147.msg1373411#msg1373411 date=1312236367]
[quote author=themn link=topic=46147.msg1373381#msg1373381 date=1312231832]
Whad - it might be a good idea to break certain Facebook links.

Suspecting something and actually having write infront of you are eons apart.

You have more than enough to contend with.
You really don't need or want to become embroiled in the mess that social networking can bring.

Just a thought, sir.

Oh, and ask Bunnyman if he can hook you up with one of those "younger models", SLY MUTHA FUCKA !
[/quote]

Facebook? Sorry mate, not following you... Dunno if I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but in my last post, I meant about life in general.
[/quote]

What themn means is for you to delete her off Facebook.

Which is probably a good idea, but one that's pretty hard sometimes.

I've been a part of her family for 7 years; it's quite hard to accept that I might be replaced soon. Still have to prepare for it though.

Your friends are cunts though, and you're better off with them. SOme of them are probably just friends with you through your ex; and those are all going to disappear. But some friends were your friends before, so they may stick around. Big talk, since I dont have a clue who's going to stick around for me save for a handful.
[/quote]

That's all you need mate, and some people don't even have that.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=46147.msg1367294#msg1367294 date=1311088198]
I know that it will get better, but I also know that it will take time. It also doesn't help that she's not skipped a beat since leaving... I've seen more of my wife in a tiny little bikini on Facebook in the past month than I did in real life in the past two years! But, this is what she wanted, so I shouldn't be surprised that she's 'adjusted' better to our situation than I have... "It's hard for me too", she assures me regularly, but it's not so fucking hard that she's had a moment's hesitation in doing it!
[/quote]

This is what I was referring to.

Don't do it to yourself.

It can (and sometimes does) lead to some fucked up stuff.

Again, just a suggestion.
 
So, I'm sitting here all evening, having to try to explain to my 7 year old why her Mammy's never coming home... I just now got her down

How the fuck do I do that?

Why is she not here, Daddy? Do you not love her anymore, Daddy? Is she never coming home, Daddy? Does she not love you, Daddy?

How the fuck do I answer that last one..?

She is so sad. And confused.

I hurt more for them than I do for me. And I fucking hurt for me, believe me..!

How in the fuck is all of this pain worth it? Seriously?

Fuck this. Fuck this. Fuck this. Fuck this. Fuck this.
 
She dumped the kids too?

Seriously, how can a mother dump her kids?

She is one mixed up mental lady.
 
Mike, if I remember rightly one child's stayed with each parent.

Derek old friend, every man-jack on here is pulling for you. I hope there may be times when that realisation helps.
 
[quote author=Judge Jules link=topic=46147.msg1374364#msg1374364 date=1312446302]
Mike, if I remember rightly one child's stayed with each parent.

Derek old friend, every man-jack on here is pulling for you. I hope there may be times when that realisation helps.
[/quote]

That is even worse, separating siblings! The trauma of missing one parent is already bad enough. My prayers are with you Derek and especially the young innocent ones.
 
No, she didn't dump the kids. Just me.

We're doing a joint custody agreement, where we basically split their time 50/50.

And we didn't seperate them from each other - Neither of us would even consider doing that. They're together almost every night, with the occassional one-on-one 'date' night with each parent, which they love.
 
[quote author=Whaddapie link=topic=46147.msg1374334#msg1374334 date=1312424909]
Why is she not here, Daddy? Do you not love her anymore, Daddy? Is she never coming home, Daddy? Does she not love you, Daddy?

How the fuck do I answer that last one..?
[/quote]

Again, I can only speak from the child's point of view in this situation but I think the best thing you can do is be honest with them. They may not fully understand it, but they'll appreciate your honesty nonetheless.

If they ask, just explain to your children simply that mummy doesn't want to be with daddy anymore. You don't have to go into detail and if you don't really know why she's left then just be honest and say that. If your children want to ask mummy why then they can do that. Just be sure that you don't apportion any blame when you explain the situation, and reassure them that both mummy and daddy love them very much, and you've basically done the best you can.

That's what my mum did for me, and I don't think she could have done any more. My dad spent a great deal more time badmouthing my mum and apportioning blame, and I have forever resented him for it.
 
This is a bit like 'Dont cry Daddy' by Elvis.

You need to accept things and just move the fuck on Del. The longer you sit in the why me why phase the longer it will take to start being a human being again.
She doesnt love you and doesnt want to be with you anymore. Thats the end of it. So hard as it may be you have to respect that shit and move on, as im sure you would rather her be happy than stay with you and pretend to be?

So thats it, your new life starts now. So brush yourself off, and think about the things you have been unable to do this past 10 years and go and do them.

I know its easy for me to say but if i were to break up with Misred because she didnt want to be with me anymore i would accept it, probably be a bit upset, then get on with my life.

Regarding your kiddiewinks just be honest. Sometimes things just dont work out, and thats life, you tried hard but it wasnt to be etc.
Hope you feel better soon bud, but i would suggest you start with utter acceptance and then go on from there.
 
Just be honest and truthful Del mate as Oncy said. Retain your dignity. Don't badmouth your ex. Once your kids are grown up they'll respect you hugely for it. Trust me - this is something I've see with my own eyes with some friends kids. The truth comes out over time and you'll have a relationship with your kids no-one can destroy from thereon.
 
[quote author=Sunny link=topic=46147.msg1374432#msg1374432 date=1312459288]
Just be honest and truthful Del mate as Oncy said. Retain your dignity. Don't badmouth your ex. Once your kids are grown up they'll respect you hugely for it. Trust me - this is something I've see with my own eyes with some friends kids. The truth comes out over time and you'll have a relationship with your kids no-one can destroy from thereon.
[/quote]
Well said Sunny.
 
[quote author=Herr Onceared link=topic=46147.msg1374415#msg1374415 date=1312455986]
This is a bit like 'Dont cry Daddy' by Elvis.

You need to accept things and just move the fuck on Del. The longer you sit in the why me why phase the longer it will take to start being a human being again.
She doesnt love you and doesnt want to be with you anymore. Thats the end of it. So hard as it may be you have to respect that shit and move on, as im sure you would rather her be happy than stay with you and pretend to be?

So thats it, your new life starts now. So brush yourself off, and think about the things you have been unable to do this past 10 years and go and do them.

I know its easy for me to say but if i were to break up with Misred because she didnt want to be with me anymore i would accept it, probably be a bit upset, then get on with my life.

Regarding your kiddiewinks just be honest. Sometimes things just dont work out, and thats life, you tried hard but it wasnt to be etc.
Hope you feel better soon bud, but i would suggest you start with utter acceptance and then go on from there.
[/quote]

I'll never, ever respect it Andy. It's a load of bollocks.

What I have to do is accept it, not respect it.

And I do, in real life, though it's not easy letting go of 14 years, mate. Having to do something and being able to do it whole-heartedly are two very different things. Especially when it's not something that you want to do.

This is where I come to howl at the moon.

If I'm pissing people off, I apologize. Don't read this thread if that's the case, 'cos this is where I come to vent... I can't do it to her, or the kids, or our friends, so I come here. And I'll continue to come here and write until I'm over it, which will probably be quite a while, I'm afraid. But I'll keep it all in here, so people can avoid it if they grow weary of my musings...

So again, apologies in advance for the shite that I will spout forth over the next while - It's either that or go out and batter somebody.
 
While I like the idea of you battering a random, I don't think you're pissing anyone off by venting here. Get if off your chest.
 
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