Everton

[Sheik Yerbouti]

“Member at the start of the season when Everton signed a load of leaders. Burnley captain Ajax captain. United & England captain. Iceland captain. Had wales captain. Fuck me I’d sell the lot for one Lee Carsley or someone with a pair of balls that can tackle. Fucking team of rats”

Lee Carsley hahaha

 

[FoxForceFive]

I was at a christening today & almost every fella there was a blue. Me & two of the other lads who have married into the family are reds & were all sat together.

They were all recording the game to watch when they got home. We were just sat there pissing ourselves looking at the score, & all delighted in then looking as pissed off as we could & "accidentally" saying slightly too loud that Sigurdsson had scored, leaving them with the distinct impression that they'd won.

There'll be some dogs being booted round their houses this evening.

 

[darkstarexodus]

I was at a christening today & almost every fella there was a blue. Me & two of the other lads who have married into the family are reds & were all sat together.

They were all recording the game to watch when they got home. We were just sat there pissing ourselves looking at the score, & all delighted in then looking as pissed off as we could & "accidentally" saying slightly too loud that Sigurdsson had scored, leaving them with the distinct impression that they'd won.

There'll be some dogs being booted round their houses this evening.

Hahahahah that's brilliant.

 

[darkstarexodus]

[bcolor=rgb(253, 251, 248)]Gylfi Sigurdsson[/bcolor] [bcolor=rgb(253, 251, 248)][/bcolor] [bcolor=rgb(253, 251, 248)]Swansea[/bcolor] 49,40 Mill. €
Michael Keane Burnley 28,50 Mill. €
Jordan Pickford Sunderland 28,50 Mill. €
Davy Klaassen AFC Ajax 27,00 Mill. €

Yannick Bolasie Crystal Palace 28,90 Mill. €
Morgan Schneiderlin Man Utd 22,90 Mill.

Those purchases look more dire every time they get posted.

Has Pickford even been that good for them? He was getting plaudits at the beginning of the year but how is he getting on now? Must be wondering what he's signed on for.

 

[Halmeister]

In Pickford's defence - no pun intended - he's playing behind a load of cloggers. He's getting no protection at all.

One of my best mate's is a blue and I was out with him last night. He's fully aware of how shit they are and was telling me about how other blues in our circle of friends are still optimistic of a top half finish.

He told me, as he'd told them, the following stat to hammer home his point of how shit they are: In Everton's previous 12 league fixtures, Jordan Pickford had completed the most passes of ANY Everton player in four of those games.

They're right up the shitter.

 

[Woland]

I was at a christening today & almost every fella there was a blue. Me & two of the other lads who have married into the family are reds & were all sat together.

They were all recording the game to watch when they got home. We were just sat there pissing ourselves looking at the score, & all delighted in then looking as pissed off as we could & "accidentally" saying slightly too loud that Sigurdsson had scored, leaving them with the distinct impression that they'd won.

There'll be some dogs being booted round their houses this evening.

Everton wives, run for your lives

 

[Ryan]

Martin O'Neill apparently odds on favourite to get the gig all of a sudden.

 

[Woland]

 

[Sheik Yerbouti]

Mike Parry the Sun reading bellwhiff

 

[blert boy]

One of the bluenose on the moan in, came up with the stat that every team which has conceded 28 or more goals in 13 games has been relegated. He kept saying "we're going to have to buck the trend, we're going to have to buck the trend"

They're rotten from the top down, Dame Edna Kenwright has stashed all the money in dodgy offshore accounts and hedge funds, The new sugar daddy turns out to be a stooge for someone who owns about 30 % of Arsenal, breaking premiership rules The new stadium will go on hold and wont be built if they go down, . They haven't had a manager for 5 weeks, 5 fuckin weeks and no one o the horizon The caretaker manager has fallen out with the senior players in the squad, they've spunked 100 odd million on a load of shite and only 17000 of the WE GO THE GAME boys turned up for their last home game and some of that would have been away fans.

And to make it even fucking better, not that it can get much better, 6 months ago they were all walking round thinking they were gods gift to football, their time had come, the blue renaissance, they had money to spend, they were building a new state of the art 60000 seater stadium. They were going to be European Royalty, rubbing shoulders with the likes of Barca but instead it will be Blackburn and Villa.

Footballs a cruel mistress but I love her.

 

[Hansern]

Shame I'm not on Twitter anymore, as it would be fun to read John Merro's posts these days.

Pickford just isnt very good either.

 

[Brizzle]

Pickford has looked very good at times, and inexperiened at others, which is what i'd expect to see from a highly rated young goalkeeper. Ev need to stick by him, as I think he'll become one of the best in the league in years to come - but he isn't there yet.

On paper the signings look good but none of them are playing at even 10% of their level. Schneiderlin, Rooney, Bolasie, Siggurdsson in your midfield & attack should be fine, but they've botched it all up. Great to see. The problem is that a half decent manager will be able to get them back to equilibrium, but it has been a fun journey so far.

 

[Gary25]

Haha a Bitter has just been properly crying on the radio.

Heard that. A Liverpool fan on the wind up I'd say is more likely.

 

[Hansern]

Pickford will become a good keeper, but not one of the best in the league in my opinion. He's overrated.

Everton have signed loads of players that have given the team a very unbalanced look. I doubt a half decent manager can get it going without spending some serious money.

 

[gkmacca]

Everton have become like any other Bill Kenwright production - old-fashioned, unimaginative, comically incompetent and critically derided. They only need Jenny Seagrove to come off the bench and it'll be his masterpiece.

 

[Rosco]

Everton have become like any other Bill Kenwright production - old-fashioned, unimaginative, comically incompetent and critically derided. They only need Jenny Seagrove to come off the bench and it'll be his masterpiece.

Macca with references i have to google again.I'm the Danny Rose of Macca jokes.

You couldn't have just thrown in Stallone instead ?

 

[Athens]

Macca with references i have to google again.I'm the Danny Rose of Macca jokes.

You couldn't have just thrown in Stallone instead ?

* Googles Danny Rose *

 

[gkmacca]

* Googles Danny Rose *

He's an unsettled left back.

 

[Judge Jules]

“Member at the start of the season when Everton signed a load of leaders. Burnley captain Ajax captain. United & England captain. Iceland captain. Had wales captain. Fuck me I’d sell the lot for one Lee Carsley or someone with a pair of balls that can tackle. Fucking team of rats”

Lee Carsley hahaha

I like the concept of "balls that can tackle". Imagine toting a pair of those around.

 

[doctor_mac]

I like the concept of "balls that can tackle". Imagine toting a pair of those around.

The last thing you want are balls that want to go flying into tackles. For the love of God, please, please stay in the safety and comfort of my boxers chaps.

 

[Hansern]

From getting rejected by Rangnick to Fat Sam.

Everton re-open Allardyce talks

Everton have reopened talks with Sam Allardyce about becoming their next permanent manager, Sky Sports News understands.

 

[HC]

They do need a pulis or a fat Sam.

Someone who can get them back to pure turgid football and get them 15th or whatever

 

[Woland]

I sent my fucking bullshit son this link and he said yeah, he got told this morning Fat Sam was being interviewed by his mate at the club and got 30 quid on it at 7/1. I just looked and he's now 1/4. I fucking hate my kids.

 

[Woland]

He's interviewing well though. Committed.

 

[Brizzle]

Going from Koeman to Fat Sam is such an epic fall from grace (even though there was argubaly any grace to begin with). Its sets an expectation of 'our aim is not to get relegated' each season and nothing more.

 

[Halmeister]

Fat Sam will keep them up, unfortunately.

 

[Dreambeliever]

Fat Sam is exactly what they need right now

 

[FoxForceFive]

Fat Sam will keep them up, unfortunately.

Yep. Playing a horrific 'brand' of 'football' that will delight their fans as they beat teams by one goal margins & continually play a shite but unfortunately effective one dimensional game.

Then next season they'll finish mid table, & at the end of the season or the season after they'll grow impatient at the lack of progress & sack him in favour of a better regarded manager.

 

[doctor_mac]

Fat Sam hates us too, so he's already got one of the desirable criteria.

 

[darkstarexodus]

Everton are the only thing keeping a smile on my face right now. Sincerely hope they get turned down by Fat Sam as he'll surely keep them up.

That said, an Everton team run by Fat Sam getting relegated would be too amazing.