West Brom (h) - post match chat

[refugee]

I played in a goal in a game once when I had a slight injury.

We had a corner and the opposition broke quickly and were 2 on 1 against me.

As they tried to pass the ball to each other I just ran up the pitch.

They though they had scored until I pointed out to the ref that with me 50 yards from goal their was nobody to play them onside.

Goal was ruled out and they were ropable

It takes 2 people to play someone onside. You running up the pitch would have made no difference whatsoever as the pass they made would have been called offside even if you were still in nets.

Here on the left is a quick illustration of what you described, and here on the right is a quick illustration of what would have happened if you had stayed in nets, and the two strikers had continued to fuck up the move. As you can see, they both have the same result.

 

[Dreambeliever]

It takes 2 people to play someone onside. You running up the pitch would have made no difference whatsoever as the pass they made would have been called offside even if you were still in nets.

Here on the left is a quick illustration of what you described, and here on the right is a quick illustration of what would have happened if you had stayed in nets, and the two strikers had continued to fuck up the move. As you can see, they both have the same result.

I described it poorly so, I was still goalside when they passed it, but by coming out of my area it panicked the player in possession to pass to his teammate and as you have said meant that as it was a forward pass he was automatically offside.

If I'd stayed on my line the guy with the ball would have just ran through and shot.

 

[StevieM]

Your charge shouldn't have mattered - all the second attacking player needed to do, was not be in front of the ball when it was passed.

 

[Silver Sean]

I've read this description a few times on here. Or maybe it's you saying it more than once. In any case, it does have some truth in it.

His whole positioning and body shape when high balls come into the box do not look anything like a goalkeeper. And his delayed reactions to them when he belatedly springs into life and goes the wrong way in a frozen claw-handed spazfit - looks like a cat that's been shot in the arse with an pellet gun.

Klopp should spend every second of the week simply firing cross after cross into the box, until he grows in confidence and ability at dealing with high balls. It;s odd that he doesn't seem to have worked on it already, as it was well known this was a weakness before he even arrived.

Achterberg...

 

[nealmac]

I'm still trying to figure out what Dreamy is on about.

 

[manwithnoname]

I played in a goal in a game once when I had a slight injury.

We had a corner and the opposition broke quickly and were 2 on 1 against me.

As they tried to pass the ball to each other I just ran up the pitch.

They though they had scored until I pointed out to the ref that with me 50 yards from goal their was nobody to play them onside.

Goal was ruled out and they were ropable

Erm......anyone?

 

[Mystic]

I played in a goal in a game once when I had a slight injury.

We had a corner and the opposition broke quickly and were 2 on 1 against me.

As they tried to pass the ball to each other I just ran up the pitch.

They though they had scored until I pointed out to the ref that with me 50 yards from goal their was nobody to play them onside.

Goal was ruled out and they were ropable

Not this shit again.

 

[Mystic]

Erm......anyone?

He told this story a few years back, it sticks in my mind because of the utter disdain it was met with back then, I feel we'll see a similar response here today.

 

[doctor_mac]

Well, it sounds like both of the players Dreamy was playing against, and the referee were Dreamier than Dreamy. Dreamy went full dreamy, and then the two players and the referee went beyond full dreamy, being mesmerised by Dreamy's bewildering foray upfield.

 

[manwithnoname]

Well, it sounds like both of the players Dreamy was playing against, and the referee were Dreamier than Dreamy. Dreamy went full dreamy, and then the two players and the referee went beyond full dreamy, being mesmerised by Dreamy's bewildering foray upfield.

Then a disembodied voice boomed 'AS YOU WERE' and everyone had an aneurysm

 

[the count]

Surely the story has to end with "and then I woke up"

 

[manwithnoname]

Surely the story has to end with "and then I woke up"

Nobody wakes up. Ever. It's a never ending nightmare.

 

[Hansern]

Bet he was watching this and fell asleep;

 

[doctor_mac]

Bet he was watching this and fell asleep;

It would be impossible to fall asleep watching 'Shaolin Soccer' given that it is simultaneously the funniest football film ever and the funniest martial arts film ever.

 

[Hansern]

It would be impossible to fall asleep watching 'Shaolin Soccer' given that it is simultaneously the funniest football film ever and the funniest martial arts film ever.

As they say; "Get ready to kick some grass"..

 

[refugee]

It would be impossible to fall asleep watching 'Shaolin Soccer' given that it is simultaneously the funniest football film ever and the funniest martial arts film ever.

Kung Fu Hustle was a funnier martial arts film, but close enough

 

[Mystic]

Surely the story has to end with "and then I woke up"

Sounds like more of a "and then everyone clapped" story to me.