Is it too much to ask for a winger with a bit of fucking unpredictability? A bit of spice? A bit of headscratching skill? A bit of did-you-fucking-see-that!?
No, we have to get linked with the fucking Lucases of the left wing. Neat, tidy, composed, good ball retainers. Rieira, Kewell, pennant, Jovanovic. All about as boring as a winger gets.
And now Downing. Everything he does on a pitch you could read about in the day before's papers he's that fucking predictable. Even looking at him angers me.